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Gory Grub

~ grossness degree 3 ~

Index

Mucous Membrane Milkshake
Bloody Bug Juice
Bloody Eyeballs on the Rocks
Flaming Ghost Cake
Dead Man's Meatloaf
Crispy Caterpillar Cocoons
Brain Dip
Day-Old Bathwater
Nuclear Waste Punch
Fossil Pops

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MUCOUS MEMBRANE MILKSHAKE

2 cups buttermilk
2 scoops vanilla ice cream
1/2 cup pinapple juice
4 Tbls brown sugar
2 cups milk

Place all ingredients except the milk into a blender.
Blend on medium speed until smooth and creamy.
Add more ice cream if you like your mucus extra thick ;)

Fill tall glasses with the mixture and refrigerate.

Heat the milk in a small pan over
medium heat until it begins to boil.
Remove from the heat and let it cool
until a film develops on the surface.

Using a sooden spoon, carefully scoop off the film
and place some on top of each milkshake.

If you need more mucous just reheat
the remaining milk and repeat this step.
Be careful not to burn the milk.

And then it gets really disgusting
and makes this suggestion:
"Blend chunks of pineapple into your milkshake
for phelgm balls or red cherries for blood clots"!

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BLOODY BUG JUICE

2 12 oz pkgs frozen strawberries, defrosted
1 6 oz can lemonade concentrate, thawed
1 qt ginger ale
1 cup raisins
1 cup blueberries, fresh or frozen

Place the strawberries in a bowl and mash with a fork.
In a large pitcher, mix the strawberry mash,
lemonade, and ginger ale.

Place handfuls of raisins and
blueberries (bugs) into tall glasses.

Pour the liquid over the bugs,
then sit back and watch the bugs and scum
rise to the top of each glass!

Serving suggestions:
Double or triple recipe and put in punch bowl.
Drape some gummy worms over the rim
of the bowl for a particularly swampy-looking effect!!

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BLOODY EYEBALLS ON THE ROCKS

12 radishes
1 7 oz jar pimento-stuffed olives
1 46 oz can tomato juice

Prepare the day before you plan to serve them.

Peel 12 radishes, leaving thin streaks
of red skin on them for blood vessels.

Using the tip of the vegetable peeler or a small knife,
carefully scoop out a small hole in each radish.
Stuff a green olive, pimento side out, in each hole.

Place 1 radish eyeball in each section
of an empty ice cube tray.
Fill the tray with water and freeze overnight.

Pur tall glasses 3/4 full of tomato juice
and add a pair of eyeballs to each glass.
Cheers!

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FLAMING GHOST CAKE

-Make a 9"x13" cake in any flavor.
-When cool, cut the 2 upper corners into a
gentle curve to form the top of the ghost's head.
-Use the pieces that you cut off of the top
to form the head to make grabbing arms.
-Cut triangles out of the bottom of the cake
to make it look whispy, as if it were floating.
-Frost the whole cake with white frosting.
-Decorate mouth and nose with licorice.
-Use 2 clean eggshell halves, 2 sugar cubes
(must be cubes) and brandy for the eyes.
-For an impressive longer burning ghost,
soak the sugar cubes in the brandy before lighting.
-Make sure to turn out the lights before lighting!

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DEAD MAN'S MEATLOAF

-Use your favorite meatloaf recipe, but instead of shaping it into a log, shape it into a corpse.
-Legs together, arms folded across chest.
-Bake as usual, but before serving, stab the poor guy in the heart and dump ketchup on him.
-Guaranteed to gross out just about anyone!

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CRISPY CATERPILLAR COCOONS

•1 8-oz. tube refrigerated crescent rolls
•8 beef sausages (such as Brown & Serve)
•1 squeeze bottle yellow mustard

-Preheat oven according to directions
on the crescent-roll package.

-Prepare the sausages according
to the directions on the package.

-Use tongs to remove the cooked sausages
from the frying pan and place them on paper towels.

-Allow to cool 10-15 minutes.

-Cut the sausages in half lengthwise.

-Then use the rounded tip of a carrot peeler
to scoop out a long, shallow trough
down the length of each half.

-Squeeze a thin line of mustard into each trough.

-Separate the crescent-roll dough
into its pre-cut triangle pieces,
and lay them flat on an ungreased cookie sheet.

-To form insect larvae, take two sausage halves and,
with their mustard-filled sides touching,
put them together to form a whole.

-Place a whole larva at the wide end of each dough triangle,
and roll up dough as you would regular crescent rolls.

-Pinch the ends and seams of the rolls closed.

-Bake according to package instructions.

[Warning: They take a good 15-20 minutes to cool off!]

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BRAIN DIP

•1 whole cauliflower
•Your favorite spinach or dill dip
•Radishes
•Assorted raw vegetables
•Crackers for dipping

-Cut florets from the top of the cauliflower
until you have a cauliflower 'bowl'.

-Remove greens from bottom.

-Cut stems from radishes, leave the root, remove skin.

-Using toothpicks and food coloring, draw an eyeball
on the flat part of the radish (where the top was).

-The root will look like the optic nerve.

-Fill cauliflower with dip, garnish with radish 'eyes',
serve with veggies and crackers.

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DAY-OLD BATHWATER

Serves about 30 dirty, nonbathing buddies.

•12 oz. can frozen lemonade
•12 oz. can frozen pink lemonade
•12 oz. can frozen limeade
•1/2 gallon rainbow sherbert

-About 45 minutes before serving time, set cans of lemon
and limeade and the container of sherbert out to thaw.

-After 15 minutes, scoop out half of the sherbert's
containers contents and place it into a brownish color.

-Place the remaining sherbert back in.

-Prepare lemon and limeades according to the
package directions and pour into the punch bowl.

-Carefully float spoonfuls of the brown blended sherbert on top of the lemonade mixture, spreading it around to look like dirty brown suds.

-Do not stir.

-Use a ladle to serve punch in cups.

Sicko serving suggestion:
Float a handful of green, yellow and white tiny after dinner mints (for tiny bars of soap), on top of your scummy punch.

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NUCLEAR WASTE PUNCH

This one is not for kids!
Potent, it tastes good and looks hideous.

•1 measure blue curacao
•1 measure Bailey's Irish Cream
•Top up with one pint cider
•Toffee bars (control rods)

-Mix all together.

The end result is a sort of greenish-brown liquid with scummy bits floating in it and a THICK layer of scum on top.

Alternate version: blue curacao, orange juice, and vodka...neon green color.

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FOSSIL POPS

Yield: 12 suckers

•12 lollipop sticks (see note)
•12 gummy worms, dinosaurs or Swedish fish gummy candies
•2 cups sugar
•3/4 cup light corn syrup
•3/4 cup water
•1/4 to 2 tsp. flavoring extract or flavoring oil
(see note) depending on intensity of flavor
•Red & yellow liquid food coloring

-Lightly oil 2 large cookie sheets.

-Place on wire cooling racks.

-Arrange 6 sticks on each so syrup
won't touch or drip over edge when poured.

-Put a candy at top of each.

-Stir sugar, corn syrup and water in a saucepan over medium-high heat just until sugar dissolves.

-Without stirring, boil ;until candy thermometer
registers 300F to 310F.

-Immediately remove from heat and
wait just until boiling stops.

-Stir in extract or oil (you'll need more extract than oil)
and a drop of each color (red & yellow).

-Working quickly, spoon 2-3 tbsp. syrup to cover upper 1/4 sticks and the candies. (Lollipops will have odd shapes
and candies may melt slightly, but will firm as pops cool.)

-Cool completely, then gently slide pops off cookie sheet.

-Wrap individually in plastic wrap (waxed paper sticks).

[Note]
Flavoring oils and lollipop sticks are available at
baking-supply shops, party-supply and craft stores.

Go back to the Halloween page.