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Gruesome Grub

~ grossness degree 4 ~

(not for the
faint of heart or
weak of stomach!!)

Index

Blood Soup
Dead Fingers
Brain Cookies
French Fried Eye Balls
Bugs In Dirt Sandwiches
Brain Cell Salad
Crusty Booger Balls
Yet Another Eyeball Dish!
Frog's Eye Salad
(- - - - !!!!!!!)
There's a Bug in my Drink!
Bone Sandwiches
Vampire's Blood Shake
Green Eye Pie
Gory Hand
Eyeball Snacks
Spider Salad

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BLOOD SOUP

This is an easy recipe.
You will need a can of tomato soup and a pack of musksticks.
First, cook the soup in a pan over a stove.
Then break up the musk sticks
and put them into the soup to create...
...blood soup with delicious fingers!

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DEAD FINGERS

This is a shortbread type cookie that look like fingers.
The dough is piped onto the cookie sheet
(use a bag without any tip to get a finger sized cylinder) .
Then using the dull side of a butter knife make lines
suggesting knuckle and wrinkles,
and add an almond for the fingernail.
I found the unblanched variety look particularly creepy.
You can add a bit of red icing if you want a bloody finger
(ie.that translucent yuk that comes in a tube).
I have experimented with this idea and
found it better to make an impression with the
almond rather then bake them and "glue" the
almonds to the finger afterwards with the "blood".
This gives a new twist to the term "finger foods".'

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BRAIN COOKIES

Ok, if you're still with me, the next item is a brain cookie.
You colour a icebox type dough
a sickening purplish/gray shade and then push the dough
through a colander to make extruded spaghetti shapes.
Then you loosely pat spoonfuls of the dough into brain shapes
(well at least most kids' notions of how a brain is shaped).
I think I experimented with different kitchen tools
with this one and ended up using one of those
collapsable steamer things to make the spaghetti.

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FRENCH FRIED EYE BALLS

2 pototoes
relish

Mash potatoes and mold them into balls.
Cook 160C in oven 20 min.
Spread relish over and enjoy!

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BUGS IN DIRT SANDWICHES

For this you will need white bread,
a pack of mixed bug shaped lollies and milo.
First, spread your slices of bread with margerine or butter.
Then, sprinkle the buttered slices with milo until coated.
Carefully stick the bugs firmly into the milo
and place remaining slice of bread on top.
Voila! you have bugs in dirt sandwichs!

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BRAIN CELL SALAD

1 (6-ounce) package blueberry gelatin dessert mix
1 (16-ounce) container small-curd cottage cheese
1 (16 1/2-ounce) can blueberries in syrup
(or 3/4 cup frozen blueberries, thawed)
blue food coloring

Prepare gelatin according to the directions on the package.
Chill for four to five hours, or until firm.
Scoop cottage cheese into bowl.
Drain and set aside the syrup from the blueberries.
Add the berries to the cottage cheese and mix well.
Add three drops food coloring to turn the cottage cheese
a nice qrayish color when blended.
To serve salad, place a few spoonfuls of firm gelatin
(congealed brain fluids) onto individual plates.
Top with a scoop of cottage cheese (brain tissue)
mixture and serve.

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CRUSTY BOOGER BALLS

1 (14-ounce) can sweetened condensed milk
5 1/3 cups flaked coconut (about 14 ounces)
1 large 8-ounce package lime-flavored gelatin
1 cup ground, blanched almonds
1 teaspoon almond extract

In a large bowl, combine sweetened condensed milk, coconut,
1/3 cup of the unprepared gelatin,
almonds, and almond extract.
Mix well with a large mixing spoon or rubber spatula.
Cover bowl with platic wrap and chill for about an hour
or until mixture is firm enough to mold in your hands.
Scoop by 1/2 teaspoonfuls and shape into various-sized balls.
Place them on a baking sheet,
lined with a sheet of waxed paper.
Make sure they are all slightly different, just as each
and every booger is unique and special.
Place a second sheet of waxed paper on
your work surface and pour remaining unprepared
lime gelatin on the center of the waxed paper.
Roll each ball in gelatin to coat well
and create a thin outer layer.
Then place back on the baking sheet.
Return boogers to the refrigerator
for an hour befofe seving,
and store any extras in the refrigerator.

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YET ANOTHER EYEBALL DISH!

Buy a can of lychee fruits and simply stuff the little devils
with grapes (try mixing red and green grapes).
Serve in a hollowed out gourd.

Wash this down with
Vampire blood....

Any red-coloured drink will do.
Simply serve it in small pumpkin-type gourds
that have been cleaned out.
Use black liquorice for straws, and start sucking.

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FROG'S EYE SALAD

1 cup Acini De Pepe
2 cups mandarin oranges
1 cup pineapple tidbits
1 1/2 cups marshmallows
3 egg yolks
3 Tbsp. flour
1 cup sugar
1 reg. size Cool Whip

Boil Acini De Pepe in salted water til tender,
but not soft (about 10 minutes) and drain. Drain fruit.
Thicken fruit juice, egg yolks, flour and sugar.
Add drained Acini De Pepe while dressing is still hot,
then let the whole mixture cool.
When cooled, fold in marshmallows,
fruit, and Cool Whip. Chill.

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(- - - - !!!!!!!)

Ok..all you guys that are going to make
this gruesome delight pay attention now!
I've found a great way to shape the Tootsie rolls.
When they are soft and shapaeable you blunt the ends.
Then you roll slightly to make them evenly cylindrical
(pencil width) then indent with your [CLEAN]
fingernails to ring it like a raccoon tail, stretch slightly
then push gently back together.
I think you guys get the idea right???
More "realistic" the better [grosser]!!!!!!!

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THERE'S A BUG IN MY DRINK!

Put raisins in your punch for bugs!

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BONE SANDWICHES

Cut the crusts off of some slices of white bread.
Spread peanut butter and jam on the bread.
Roll the sandwiches up. Ta da!
You have bones with blood and marrow for dinner!

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VAMPIRE'S BLOOD SHAKE

2 cups plain yogurt
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 package frozen strawberries or raspberries,
thawed ice cubes
1 pint strawberry ice cream

Mix yogurt, vanilla, and berries in the blender.
Pour into tall glasses over ice cubes, or chill.
Top with a big spoonful of strawberry ice cream.

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GREEN EYE PIE

In a bowl combine 2 cups of washed and dried
green grapes and 1/2 cup of sour cream.
Pour into 1 prepared graham cracker pie crust.
Right before serving,
sprinkle with 2 tablespoons of brown sugar.

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GORY HAND

Presentation is everything!

This is both a yummy treat and
a great decoration to scare your friends.
Use a clean rubber glove.
Make a strong cherry or other red jello
by using 3/4 of the recommended amount of water.
Hang the glove over the sink by using
clothes pins attached to thin strips of wood.
When the jello has cooled,
pour into glove and place in the deep freeze.
Be careful not to have the hand pressing
against anything or it will ruin the shape.
When the jello is frozen
cut the glove off using small scissors.
Keep your masterpiece in the fridge
until ready to display.

alternate Gory Hand tip:

Take a clean rubber glove and fill it with water,
tie it and put it in the deep freeze.
Keep it in there until your party.
When you're ready take it out of the glove
and put it in the punchbowl instead of ice!

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EYEBALL SNACKS

1 lb. icing sugar
1 egg white
peppermint essence
black liquorice
blue or green colouring

Beat the egg white lightly and blend with a small
amout of icing sugar and a few drops of peppermint essence.
Mix until you get a fine dry paste.
Using your hands knead the paste adding small
amounts of icing sugar until the paste will absorb it.
Separate a small quatitiy to make the irises,
adding a few drops of blue or green coloring and mix.
Roll the white mixture into small round balls.
Press a hole in the top of the ball with
your finger and add some of the colored mixture.
Cut a small piece off of the liquorice and place
in the middle of the colored mixture for the pupil.
Voila!

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SPIDER SALAD

Place one half of a canned peach on a plate, flat side down.
Cut eight curls off of a carrot with a vegetable peeler.
Tuck the curls under the peach to make spider legs.
Put raisins on top of peach for eyes.
Put a small piece of marachino cherry
under the raisins for the mouth.

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