TOASTS

Irish Grace:
A Toast for Nearly Every Occasion

Back in the 1500s, historians tell us, drinkers began to garnish their beer or wine with bits of spiced, toasted bread to add more flavor. Eventually, they found that some wee-chosen words often added more to the drink than crumbs of overcooked bread. Even though they stopped putting toast into their drinks, however, this word stuck and has been used ever since to mean a special sentiment expressed before a drink.

Toasting special occasions is a routine custom today. With their love of words, the Irish have developed the art of toasting to a higher level than perhaps anyone else. In fact, we think you'll agree that toasts such as the following might add a special touch to even the most commonplace drink.

FOR GOOD WISHES....

Health and life to you.
The wife (or husband) of your choice to you.
Land without rent to you.
And may you be half-an-hour in heaven
before the Devil knows you're dead.

Slainte!

May you live as long as you want,
and never want as long as you live!

May the frost never afflict your spuds.
May the outside leaves of your cabbage
always be free from worms.
May the crows never pick your haystack,
and may your donkey always be in foal.

FOR A WEDDING...

A generation of children
on the children of your children.

May you have as many children
and may they grow as mature in taste
and healthy in color
and as sought after
as the contents of this glass.

FOR AN ANNIVERSARY....

I have known many,
liked not a few,
loved only one.
I drink to you.

FOR GOOD HEALTH....

The health of the salmon to you;
a long life,
a full heart
and a wet mouth!

I drink to your coffin. May it be built from the wood of a 100-year-old oak tree -- that I shall plant tomorrow!

FOR A BIRTHDAY....

May you live as long as you want,
and never want as long as you live!

May you die in bed at 95 years,
shot by a jealous husband (or wife).

FOR A RETIREMENT, A PROMOTION OR A FAREWELL....

May the road rise to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back,
the sun shine warm upon your face,
the rain fall soft upon your fields,
and until we meet again
may God hold you in the hollow of His hand.

May your doctor never earn a dollar out of you
and may your heart never give out.
May the ten toes of your feet steer you clear of
all misfortune, and, before you're much older,
may you hear much better toasts than this.

May good fortune follow you all your life --
and never catch up with you!

HOLIDAY TOASTS....

May you have warm words on a cold evening,
a full moon on a dark night,
and a smooth road all the way to your door.

In the New Year, may your right hand always
be stretched out in friendship and never in want.

May peace and plenty be the first
to lift the latch on your door,
and happiness be guided to your home
by the candle of Christmas.
(This toast refers to the traditional custom of leaving the door unlatched, and a lighted candle in the window, on Christmas Eve.)

FOR THE BACHELOR....

May you have nicer legs than your own under the table before the new spuds are up.

May you be poor in misfortune,
rich in blessings,
slowing to make enemies,
quick to make friends.
But rich or poor, quick or slow,
may you know nothing but happiness
from this day forward.

FOR A WAKE....

May every hair on your head turn into a candle to light your way to Heaven, and may God and his Holy Mother take the harm of the years away from you.

FOR NO PARTICULAR OCCASION....

May the grass grow long on the road to Hell
for want of use.

May you have the hindsight to know where you've been,
the foresight to know where you're going,
and the insight to know when you're going too far.

Here's to you, as good as you are.
Here's to me, as bad as I am.
As good as you are and as bad as I am,
I'm as good as you are, as bad as I am.

May the roof above us never fall in,
and may we friends gathered below never fall out.

Here's to every day I see you --
and to every day I don't.

May we never want a friend in need --
or a bottle to give him!